I took this picture at Pomme de Terre lake near Elkton, Missouri. It's a little public beach at the end of a dirt road I love to visit.
The first few years of being officially an "old
lady", and not a 'this is my old lady' lady as some men say, was full of a
lot of despondency. There was a lot of eating what I shouldn't, and not
taking care of myself because I was blue. How could I even wash my face if I
didn't want to look at my reflection? My answer was I didn't! Yes, I washed it
when I was taking a shower, but I just quit using face cleaners and my once
much loved Buf-Puf. I was lucky I still used deodorant! (Actually everyone around
me was lucky on that one!) I didn't shave my legs as much as I should have
either. I was a mess!
Sure, I was getting by. I could get out of bed every day. I
could dress myself and take my son to school and his dad to work as needed. I
could feed my family mostly “normal” meals, and I could even joke about being
old. The problem was something was off. It’s hard to explain because I didn’t
know there was something…not right…in the old noggin, or maybe it was the
heart? I guess you could say I was on “autopilot”. Things got done, but it was
only at the most basic level. I did only enough to get by and keep my family
from mutiny.
About a month ago I took a selfie of myself for something I
was writing. For the umpteenth time I whined to myself because my eyebrows had
faded to the point that they were almost nonexistent. This had been bothering me for a few years,
and I hated the way it looked! This time, though, I had an amazing idea that
had NEVER occurred to me before! I could dye them darker! Yes, this was not a
new advanced idea in beauty. Others have dyed their eyebrows for decades, yet
it had never occurred to me that I could too! I dye my hair, yet this was a
moment when I should have heard trumpets play!
I did dye them and the change in how I felt was amazing! But
more important, the eyebrows lead to buying a Buf-Puf and facial cleanser. Then
the Buf-Puf led to cutting my intake of diet soft drinks and replacing it with
water with a slice of lemon, and that steered me to wanting to eat less junk!
This all happened within a months’ time, so the results aren’t noticeable on
the outside just yet, but my heart and soul feel free and light as a bird!
Now I feel like I walked out from behind a dark veil to
discover unfiltered sunshine for the first time in I honestly don’t know how
long. My heart has grown because it’s full of happiness again, and I have
rediscovered myself.
Hey! You out there! Yes, you, the one reading this. Don't give up! We will get through this together! It DOES get better!
